Worst Relationship Advice| Part 2

Remember my post from a few weeks ago? This is Part 2, because there is a lot of bad relationship advice out there, apparently. Once I asked the black girl group chat the list got longer. If you missed Worst relationship advice part 1, read it here. Let's dig in! Anything that suggests there is…

Are Interracial Relationships Harder than Same Race Relationships?

Over the past week I have witnessed or been party to two conversations about interracial relationships and in both cases, people discussed how much harder they are than same or intraracial relationships. The first instance was watching an episode of The Grapevine on Youtube where a panel discussed interracial dating in the UK (check it…

All Worst Relationship Advice I’ve Ever Received| Part 1

Love and relationship advice is everywhere when you're first married but even before you're thinking about marriage people want to give you advice and a lot of it is terrible or incomplete. People love to give relationship advice. Even people who have never had a healthy relationship that lasted longer than 90 days wanna tell…

5 Things I Know for Sure Right Now

I just passed my 35th Birthday and this is what I know for sure right now With the age came a certain amount of wisdom based on experience.  When I think of wisdom I think of those lessons that keep showing up for you over and over. Hopefully, at some point, you get the lesson,…

Should You Live Together Before Marriage?

Living together, cohabitation, shaking up...whatever you call it I have an opinion on doing it before the double rings Like so many of your favorite relationship gurus, I have some opinions on relationships backed by no research and no experiences other than my own. But since my limited experience is leading me down the aisle, I also…

Why Black Women Need Self-Care and How I am Doing it

Self-Care is a Non-negotiable for Those of us Who are Both Black and Female Self-care is a hot topic right now and everyone has an opinion on how to do it correctly. It's basically the process of giving yourself what you need at the moment, whatever that may be. Self-care is critical, especially for black women. …

Black Hair in Corporate America

Do you find yourself wondering how black is too black when it comes to hair in the office? We are in the dog days of summer (aka peak protective style season). It is that time of year where all the black girls at work start whispering in groups about how acceptable the new hair trend…

Questions Black Women in Interracial Relationships are Tired of Hearing

Interracial relationships aren't the problem, it's all the problematic folks with assumptions As a black woman in an interracial relationship, I get questions all the time and I am happy to answer most of them but there are a few things that often leave me ... perplexed (or whatever that feeling is when you are offended but…

Your Girl’s Trip Survival Guide

Girl's Trips are not always pretty but they are always worth it A good girl's trip always brings me back to center.  It is the best cure for my post 30 tendencies to be "stiff", petty and dare I admit it... uh, frumpy (do not Ms.Celie shame me, writing is best done in PJs).  When…

How I Made New Friends as a grown up

Making new friends as a fully grown ass woman is a can be challenging but it does not have to be I know the trend is to keep your circle small. I saw all the crappy memes and I get it. You cannot have 20 best friends. Even after calling on all the extrovert gods,…

5 Things Black Mothers Teach Their Daughters About Money

...Thank You to All the Mothers and Grandmothers Raising Smart, Savvy and Tenacious Daughters... I should tell you none of the lessons I am about to discuss were direct lectures to me about money. They are simply the knowledge I gain by listening and watching one joyful and determined black girl from Mobile, Alabama make…

The 3 Best Pieces of Relationship Advice I Ever Got From My Mama

We get lots of trash relationship advice in our 20s and one day I am going to make a list of the absolute worst of it but right now let's talk about the advice we receive from our mothers that, if we had listened, would have saved us so much drama. The relationship between mothers…

What “Ride or Die Chicks” Teach Us About Relationships

  What Tiny and other ride or die chicks teach us about relationships Tiny Harris (maybe not a Harris anymore because ...divorce) is the very long time romantic partner of Atlanta rapper, T.I.P Harris. We have been watching the Harris family for years off-screen, and then the last few years on-screen. On-screen, their TV show…

Don’t Be Anyone’s Safe Bet |Thoughts On One-Sided Relationships

Being dependable to others is a great but not when your time and energy are not valued Not so long ago a good CEO said to his team “Don’t be anyone’s best customer." He was talking about marketing vendors but I took it to mean so much more. Think about it... no one ever works…

Shaking off The Winter Style Blues

My Tricks for Shaking off the Winter Style Blues Let’s start by stating “ I really hate being cold”. If you are allergic to frosty temps as well, you may also feel like the Michelin Man during the winter. After weeks (or months) of wearing whatever is warm and waiting until the last minute to…

It’s Black History Month| 5 Books on Black History You Must Read This Year

Happy Black History Month, Sis I have not always loved black history month. I thought it felt ...false. Black people are woven into every American story. From revolutionaries like Crispus Attucks in the 1700s to Barack Obama today - you cannot have the country we have without them. So the idea that we have just…

Why I Loved Online Dating and How to do it Right

A Case for Online Dating  I recently took an online quiz that said I have “overwhelmingly positive views on online dating” and so do 11% of Americans. Online dating is a great way to meet people if you can allow yourself to just have fun...even on the free sites. In my online dating experience, I met…

Why You Should Break-up with Toxic Friends

How Toxic Friendships can Kill Your Whole Vibe  Have you ever had a friend do something so foul that it left you wondering if you were ever really friends? Yes. Me too. It happens.  The solution is the value yourself and the energy to give to people. Always treat people’s access to your time, space, affections,…